DEAR DEIDRE: EVEN though he’s promised to stop several times, my fiancé can’t seem to quit messaging his ex.
He talks to her secretly almost every day, even though they split up three years ago – and we’re getting married in a few months.
I’m 29, he’s 28 and we have been together for more than two years.
She seems to have a hold over him, and even though he’s not having an affair, it feels like cheating.
She’s needy and doesn’t want to let him go, despite the fact she was the one who ended their relationship.
This was his first love and their relationship makes me feel insecure and belittled.
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I don’t know if I should break off our engagement.
We do love each other but I don’t want her to be overshadowing our relationship for the rest of our lives.
DEIDRE SAYS: He may not be cheating, but your fiancé is breaking your trust by secretly talking to his ex, when he promised not to.
You need to talk to him and tell him you know they are in touch.
Ask him to explain why he can’t let her go and tell him how much this upsets you.
You may wish to delay your wedding until you feel more sure about the future with him.
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