My mum has Alzheimer's and I hardly recognise her – how can I go on?

DEAR DEIDRE: I AM watching my mum vanish due to Alzheimer’s and there’s nothing I can do about it. I’m so depressed.

Mum’s 79. I’m her son, 56, and her primary carer.

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She was diagnosed last year but her condition got worse so quickly.

Mum was always so kind and gentle.

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But now she’s aggressive, saying horrible things and hitting me with her walking stick.

She doesn’t recognise me – and nowadays I hardly recognise her.

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DEIDRE SAYS: It is a terrible illness that can affect a person’s personality and behaviour.

Although it is distressing for you, remember it is her illness talking, not your mum.

As her condition worsens, it may be worth considering a full-time care setting which could be kindest to you all.


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Talk it over with Alzheimer’s Society (, 0333 150 3456), which can direct you to local support groups for carers.

I am also attaching my support pack Help For Your Depression.

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