The heartache behind Ellie Goulding's charmed life

The heartache behind Ellie Goulding’s charmed life: As her marriage to Eton-educated Caspar Jopling flounders… a look at how star rose from her pained council estate upbringing to the A-list

Since bursting into the spotlight in 2010, Ellie Goulding has scored A-list and royal friendships, a slew of high-profile romances and a heaving trophy cabinet. 

Yet the songstress’ life has not always been so jam-packed with glamour, with her glittering lifestyle masking years of pain thanks to her fraught upbringing on a Hereford council estate surrounded by poverty and drug use. 

Ellie was estranged from her father Arthur for a decade – yet later named her son after him – while also living through a difficult relationship with her mum and stepdad and also watching her best friend locked up after ‘too much acid’. 

After seemingly finding a happy ending with her Eton-educated husband Caspar Jopling, it has now been claimed that the couple, who wed in a society wedding in 2019, are spending time apart after being hit by struggles in their marriage.

In a shock twist, it has been claimed that Ellie, who is friends with Princesses Beatrice and Eugenie, has sought an Ally in millionaire Tory peer Zac Goldsmith – placing her even further worlds away from her humble beginnings. 

Now, we take a look at the life and love of Ellie, who overcame adversity to become one of the UK’s most prolific hitmakers…  

The heartache behind Ellie Goulding’s charmed life: As her marriage to Eton-educated Caspar Jopling flounders… a look at how star swapped bleak council estate for A-listers and Royalty

Happier times: After seemingly finding a happy ending with her Eton-educated husband Caspar Jopling, it has now been claimed that the couple, who wed in a society wedding in 2019, are spending time apart after being hit by struggles in their four-year marriage

Way back when: Since bursting into the spotlight in 2010, Ellie has scored A-list and royal friendships, a slew of high-profile romances and a heaving trophy cabinet (pictured in 2010)

EARLY LIFE: BAILIFFS, ESTRANGEMENTS AND DEEP UNHAPPINESS 

Ellie was born Elena Jane Goulding in December 1986 on a council estate in Hereford, Herefordshire to her mum Tracey and her funeral director father Arthur, however the duo split when Ellie was just five. 

The star, who has a brother, Alex, and two sisters, Isabel and Jordan, described her upbringing as ‘super poor’ and branded her relationship with her mum ‘difficult’. 

She said: ‘I didn’t have the best childhood. We grew up in the smallest house. Moth-eaten, flea-ridden furniture with holes in it was handed down from my nana.’ 

In a heartbreaking memory, Ellie recalled visits from bailiffs, who took away the family television one afternoon over unpaid bills. 

She also spoke about her memories of her father, who she explained came from a undertakers and was ‘obsessed’ with murder.

Following her parents’ split she would see Arthur on alternate weekends and on one visit she claimed he gave her a book crammed with vivid pictures of various famous murders: ‘I brought it home and my mum was so freaked out she burnt it’.

She then regaled stories of her stepfather, saying: ‘He wasn’t strict and he wasn’t a drunk; he just wasn’t very intelligent… 

‘He wasn’t the type to suggest a book to read or film to watch; he was just a difficult person to live with. Even as a youngster, I knew I’d be a different adult to him.

‘He was a lorry driver with a tattoo of a bulldog smoking a spliff. The other tattoo he had was a snake with a dagger through it.’

Following years of fractious relations, Ellie did not speak to her father for a decade when they lost touch when she was 19.

In her heartbreaking song, I Know You Care, Ellie sings about her father, saying: ‘I don’t warm my hands in your coat / But I still hope.’ However she later stated: ‘[The song is] denial really, because I don’t think he does care’.

Friends: Ellie is pictured with her mother Tracey

In 2012, she said that her father’s absence ‘was a constant area of confusion and fascination for me. It’s in everything I do. It’s probably the reason why I do it.’

Following their estrangement and after meeting at a family Christening in December 2015, Ellie and her father reformed a relationship and he was spotted at one of her gigs in March the following year. 

Speaking to Elle Magazine in 2015, Ellie said: ‘I wasn’t a happy child. I felt different to everyone else. I’d separate everything…

‘I’d have friends from my council estate and then these middle-class friends from school who I’d never let come back to my house…

‘I was a classic angsty teenager. I was unhappy. I didn’t like my stepfather because he just wasn’t very nice to any of us. He wasn’t horrible, he just wasn’t interested.’

In 2016, Ellie went on to shed light on her heartbreaking need ‘to survive’ as a teen due to her surroundings. She told The Guardian: ‘A lot of my early childhood was based on survival, so it seemed like I’d be taking the piss if I f***ed up…

‘I just couldn’t afford to f**k up. My best friend is in a… well, I guess it’s an asylum. He did a lot of acid. It changed his brain. I saw firsthand what it would have been like if I’d taken another route – and my childhood really was perfect for that route…

‘I still feel like part of me is that girl, that I could easily go back into that world of wanting to be out of myself.’

I feel like I could change the world. But sometimes the response I get makes me think: ‘Oh – they’ve figured it out. They’ve figured out that I’m nothing special.’ I sometimes feel like I’m going to get found out – like I’m just a normal girl.

‘I have people thinking I’m f***ing amazing and then other people thinking I’m s**t, and it’s really hard to believe you’re good when that keeps happening. But there are occasional moments when I feel like what I’ve achieved is pretty phenomenal, considering my background.’

Shock: Ellie is pictured in 2011

HER MUSIC CAREER: LOSING HER ACCENT AND LEARNING HER ART

Ellie’s love of music flourished when she started writing songs at 15, having been learning the clarinet since nine and guitar since 14. 

She scored A grades in her English, Politics and Drama A-Levels, however shockingly failed music. Ellie went on to study English and Drama at the University of Kent.

She revealed she was determined to lose her accent so as to sound ‘proper’. 

Ellie said: ‘I became fixated on speaking well. I felt like people knew I was from a council house, and that I was poor, because of the way I spoke.’

Her big break came at an open mic talent show where she met her manager, Jamie Lillywhite, the son of producer Steve Lillywhite and the late singer Kirsty MacColl. She signed a record deal with Polydor and quit university in her final year.

The combination of her unique voice with an electro-pop backing proved successful on both sides of the Atlantic and before even releasing her debut album she won the BBC Sound of 2010 gong and the BRITS’ Critics’ Choice Award the same year. 

Her BRITS win was followed by mainstream success, when her delicate cover version of Elton John’s Your Song was used for that year’s John Lewis Christmas advert.

Since climbing the slippery music ladder, she now boasts an eye-popping trophy cabinet and has become one of the UK’s most lauded artists. 

Ellie has won two Brit Awards, a Billboard Music Award, 17 BMI London Awards, two Glamour Awards, an iHeartRadio Music Award, one MTV Italian Music Award, an NRJ Music Award, a People’s Choice Award, an Q Award, a Teen Choice Award and a Variety Hitmakers Award.

Back then: Ellie’s love of music flourished when she started writing songs at 15, having been learning the clarinet since nine and guitar since 14 (Ellie is pictured in 2012)

Stunner: She has since continued to climb the showbiz ladder

FIRST CAME SUCCESS THEN CAME ROYALTY

In an astounding accolade for the star, Prince William and Kate asked her to perform her version of Your Song for the first dance at their 2011 wedding reception. 

Later speaking about the moment, she said: ‘I mean, talk about scary. I was so nervous that my hands were shaking. That was one of my memories…

‘I remember looking down and just seeing this. Chris, my pianist, I looked over at him, and he looks at me like, ‘Literally, you have just s*** yourself. I know it in your face that you’ve just literally pooed yourself.”

At their wedding is where she met Prince Harry, leading to their reported romance.  

Catch up: In an astounding accolade for the star, Prince William and Kate asked her to perform her version of Your Song for the first dance at their 2011 wedding reception (Ellie pictured catching up with the couple last year)

Happy days! At their wedding is where she met Prince Harry, leading to their reported romance (pictured with Harry in 2014)

A-LIST AND ROYAL LOVES 

Since finding fame, Ellie has scored a slew of high-profile romances, starting with Radio 1 host Greg, now 37,  who she met at one of her live shows and dated before ending their relationship ‘amicably’ after 18 months. 

A source told The Sun at the time: ‘It was just a real struggle for them to be in the same place at the same time. The split is amicable and they are still friends.’

Following her union with Greg, Ellie and DJ Skrillex, real name Sonny John Moore, enjoyed a brief seven month romance back in 2012 but broke up when she found the long distance aspect of the relationship too difficult to deal with. 

She met the American musician, 35, when they collaborated on a song called Bittersweet for the Twilight: Breaking Dawn Part Two soundtrack.

Despite the romance only lasting a short while, the pair were reportedly so serious about each other that she was prepared to move to the States to be with him.

The songstress dated actor Jeremy Irvine, 33, for a little under a year, before he made it big in films like War Horse and Mama Mia: Here We Go Again.

The couple were snapped out and about and even made a number of red carpet appearances together.  

Ex: Ellie dated Radio 1 host Greg, now 37, after first meeting at one of her live shows before ending their relationship ‘amicably’ due to the pressures of work commitments after 18-months (Pictured together in 2011) 

While not much is known about the relationship in a 2020 interview with Glamour U.K. Ellie admitted she was  too ‘frenzied’ to find lasting love – and that her jealousy ruined relationships in her 20s.

Ellie and Ed Sheeran, 32, were then linked to each other after they were spotted holding hands at the MTV VMA awards in August 2013.

But Ellie immediately took to Twitter to deny that anything was going on between the pair, claiming they were just good friends.

In a Tweet written that night, which she later deleted, she wrote: ‘I love that holding hands with my friends means we’re an item.’ Ellie also included: ‘In that case I am in many relationships. Lover not a hater. #whatthef**k.

Meanwhile, in 2015, Ellie admitted to a fling with Niall Horan, 29, but insisted she never dated Ed in an interview with Elle. 

She said: ‘I did go on a few dates with Niall, but I was never in a relationship with Ed [Sheeran]. I have absolutely no idea where that came from and why it was turned into such a big thing.

Rocker: Ellie and Skrillex, real name Sonny John Moore, enjoyed a brief seven month romance back in 2012 but broke up when she found the long distance aspect of the relationship too difficult to deal with (pictured together in 2012)

‘I find it so frustrating that female musicians are constantly defined by the men they have or haven’t dated. It’s something I’ve talked about with Taylor (Swift) a lot. She definitely feels that.

Ellie dated McFly drummer Dougie Poynter, 35, for two years, before reportedly ending their romance in 2016 and is one of her most high profile unions.

When their relationship came to an end, Ellie said: ‘I’m not in a relationship any more and that’s been hard. Having a break will be a good thing for me and my head.’

Shortly after her split from Dougie, she was linked to Prince Harry having met at his brother’s wedding in 2011. 

They were spotted cosying up at the Audi Polo Challenge in May 2016 and reportedly exchanged flirty texts. A source told The Sun at the time: ‘He has told friends how much he likes Ellie and she is clearly taken by him.’

Former flame: The songstress dated actor Jeremy for a little under a year, before he made it big in films like War Horse and Mama Mia: Here We Go Again 

Another source told Grazia: ‘[Harry and Ellie] were part of a wider group including Tom Hardy but Harry and Ellie only had eyes for each other all night – they spent a lot of time sitting together under blankets’. 

It was then she met Eton and Oxford-educated art dealer husband Caspar, who she started dating in 2017 and tied the knot two years later in a romantic ceremony at York Minster. 

The reception for the swanky wedding was at Yorkshire’s Castle Howard attended by guests including royal pals, and stars including Katy Perry and Orlando Bloom. 

They welcomed Arthur in 2021.

Conflicting: While Ellie denied the rumours Ed said that they were dating (L-R) Harry Styles, Ed, Ellie, Rita Ora at 2013 MTV Video Music Awards 

ALL-STAR FRIENDSHIPS

Far from only having superstar romances, Ellie also boasts a whole phonebook filled with celebrity friends with her most A-list being Taylor Swift. 

On her friendship with Taylor, she said: ‘I count her as a proper friend. She knows my s**t, I know her s**t. We text and speak on the phone pretty regulalry.

‘I think we have bonded over the way it can be tough for a woman in this industry because whatever else is going on, you always feel very judged – whether it’s the length of your shorts, the relationship you’re supposed to be in, or how you look.’

Elsewhere, she is also pals with ‘former flame’ Harry’s cousins Princesses Beatrice and Eugenie, through her charity work helping the homeless.

In 2019, Eugenie thanked Ellie for her charity efforts in an Instagram post. Additionally, the trio have been seen hitting the town with a trip to watch the New York Knicks and a London night out with Karlie Kloss. 

Sweet: Elsewhere, she is also pals with ‘former flame’ Harry’s cousins Princesses Beatrice and Eugenie, through her charity work helping the homeless (Beatrice pictured at Ellie’s wedding)

Stars: Katy Perry and Orlando Bloom are pictured at Ellie’s wedding

BABY LOVE 

Ellie and Caspar welcomed baby Arthur in 2021. While her son shares her father’s name, she has never referenced the moniker or its significance. 

In April, she made rare comments about her son Arthur, saying: ‘He’s nearly two. That’s the best thing, that this album I get to see his reaction which is the greatest of all. Not when he puts his fingers in his ears to some of them…

‘But mostly… he loves [my song] Miracle and he loves How Long Will I Love You for some reason. That one too.’

She spoke to Zane Lowe on Apple Music 1 about how her life had transformed, as she said: ‘I had a child and that changes everything. It did for me anyway.

‘It was like, I mean, that happening in lockdown and it was a lot. It was a lot. And I assumed when I had Arthur that I could just go back to normal, crack on with my 10k runs and then get in the studio and everything would just be great. But no, it was not that at all.

‘I realised that I didn’t factor in how much I wanted to spend time with him, how much I wanted to just be around him all the time. So that became my new life and it is my new life and he is the biggest thing in my world. And it has changed everything for me.’

Sweet: Ellie and Caspar welcomed baby Arthur in 2021. While her son shares her father’s name, she has never referenced the moniker or its significance

CHARITABLE DEEDS  

Ellie has worked tirelessly for charities, including her prestigious work as a UN ambassador. 

Ellie said: ‘The juggle is real. I don’t get a huge amount of sleep, but I love everything. I love being a UN ambassador…

‘I’m a big environmentalist, so I love doing that and then touring is my natural habitat. I didn’t get to do it with my last album. So I’m very excited to take this one on tour.’

SPLIT AND UNLIKELY SUPPORT 

It has now been revealed that Ellie and Caspar are struggling in their romance. 

The Daily Mail can reveal that Ellie’s team had been desperately trying to keep her troubles a secret, insisting that she and Eton-educated Caspar wanted it to remain a private matter for the sake of their son.

But after weeks of discussions about how they would reveal their split, the pop star’s team finally revealed that they had been spending time apart – blaming their ‘hectic schedules’ for the demise of their marriage.

Last Tuesday evening Ellie, 33, was seen without her wedding and engagement ring when she attended the Serpentine Summer Party with Caspar, 31. The pair were pictured looking glum.

And while the news is certainly shocking, what has caused more shock is where she has sought comfort in the wake of the woes. 

It has been reported that Ellie has a found an unexpected ally in millionaire Tory peer Zac Goldsmith  – with sources saying the pair are ‘friendly.’

The two have maintained an unlikely bond over their shared love of green issues, despite their wildly different upbringings. 

Troubles: It has now been revealed that Ellie and Caspar are struggling in their romance (pictured together last week)

Woah! It has been reported that Ellie has a found an unexpected ally in millionaire Tory peer Zac Goldsmith – with sources saying the pair are ‘friendly (Zac Goldsmith, 48, pictured with second wife Alice Rothschild, who he is divorcing from after more than a decade together)

Zac is the Eton-educated son of late billionaire financier Sir James Goldsmith in stark contrast to her council estate upbringing.

Zac, 48, is also going through a marriage split, with his divorce from second wife Alice, after more than a decade together, expected soon.

But the stronger common link between the pair is their passion for the environment. They first met at the UN Climate Change Conference COP26 in Glasgow, in November 2021 and kept in contact.

Seven months later they were spotted enjoying a lunch together at upmarket cafe The Garden in Covent Garden, Central London, and were later seen at The Wolseley restaurant in Mayfair.

In October 2022 they spent the evening at the same party at the exclusive London member’s club LouLou’s at 5 Hertford Street and just weeks later they were reunited for the next global climate change summit, COP27, in Egypt.

Writing about the event in The Guardian, the singer praised her friend: ‘I attend a dinner with environment ministers and their teams from all over the world, convened by the UK’s Zac Goldsmith. 

‘You could tell they were tired but ploughing on. What amazes me about this group is that they never stop trying to get a better deal for nature.’

One friend told The Mail on Sunday: ‘Ellie and Zac have a shared interest, saving the environment. They plainly know one another and talk away from their environmental work. They come from very different backgrounds but have struck up a friendship.’

A spokesman for Ellie said on Sunday: ‘To say that Ellie speaks to Zac Goldsmith outside of work is completely untrue.’ 

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