DEAR DEIDRE: MY husband no longer wants me after a real-life bunny boiler manipulated her way into our lives.
She has seduced him, thrived off his obsession for her and enjoyed destroying me.
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We have been married for 19 years. I’m 55, he’s 56 and she’s 51. This is a second marriage for both of us.
I was always wary of this woman. She was too friendly with the men and wore provocative clothing.
Nevertheless, we were friends with both her and her partner and would regularly meet up for drinks in our local village pub.
Then when she and her partner split up she and my husband grew even closer.
He would often go to the pub without me, spending hours drinking with her.
I was worried but he insisted he knew she was trouble and was only helping a friend recover from her break-up.
One night after I’d asked him for reassurance, she texted me in the early hours, saying: “Heard you’re worried. No need. He’s absolutely safe with me.”
She then used the devil emoji. Seconds later, she forwarded me photos he had sent her — he was clearly aroused.
Another image was of him holding the bed covers up and the caption read: “Come on. You know you want it.”
As soon as he woke up, I showed him the evidence. I was devastated and sobbed my heart out.
He apologised but shrugged and said he couldn’t resist her. Then more messages came, saying I was “pathetic” and “ugly”.
He moved in with her for two months and while I wept at home, they carried on cavorting in front of the whole village.
Eventually he came home and said he didn’t want her, that she was unstable and a nasty piece of work, but I was broken and didn’t know how to put our relationship back together again.
I couldn’t have sex with him as I kept picturing images of them together. She had even sent me sex selfies of them together.
Now he says it’s over with us too and he’s looking at moving out into a rented flat.
I feel demoralised. She’s still sending nasty messages and I feel like I’m in a horror movie.
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DEIDRE SAYS: If his mind is made up, I’m afraid there is very little you can do. It would take both your efforts to move on from his affair.
You deserve to be treated better and will be happier in the long term once you put this awful episode behind you. The first step is to focus on your friends and interests.
What this woman is doing is harassment. Log any occasion she contacts you and speak to the Suzy Lamplugh Trust suzylamplugh.org (0808 802 0300) for guidance.
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