I still care about my son, even if he is a paedophile

DEAR DEIDRE: MY son is a convicted paedophile, but I can’t stop loving him.

He’s 38 and in prison for having sex with a 13-year-old girl. He even got her pregnant, so I have a grandchild I’ll never be allowed to meet.

I’ve now found out he also abused his cousins when he was a teenager and they were young children.


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I’m 60 and hate him for what he’s done but he’s still my son, and I can’t wash my hands of him.

I think someone must have abused him as a child to make him turn out this way.

He’s alone in prison now and very vulnerable. I’m terrified something bad will happen to him.

How can I come to terms with this? I feel I’ve failed as a mother.

DEIDRE SAYS: This is not your fault. Whatever may have happened to him, your son had choices.

Your confused feelings are natural – a mother doesn’t stop loving her son just because he does bad things.

You need support from people who understand and will not judge.

Contact the Prison Advice And Care Trust (prisonadvice.org.uk or call 020 7735 9535). They will understand what you’re going through.

The National Prisoners’ Families Helpline can also be of help – call 0808 808 2003.

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