Are YOU a bedroom bore? Tracey Cox reveals six sexual secret weapons that will make any encounter explosive – from audio porn to adopting a straight version of scissoring
- Tracey Cox says shake things up if you can predict your partner’s every move
- British sex expert shares six sexual weapons that transform bedroom bores
- Tips include using a clamp to stimulate nipples and listening to audio porn
Bored with routine sex? Reckon you can you predict your partner’s every move?
Time to shake things up with some secret sexual weapons!
These six manoeuvres will get more than just your hearts pounding.
Be brave and give all of them a whirl to transform from bedroom bores into the adventurous lovers you always wanted to be.
Add a clamp
Nipple stimulation is a curiously personal thing. Some people love it, others hate it and a fair few sit in the ‘What’s the fuss about? I’m not feeling much at all’ camp.
But for those who are fans – or don’t yet know they are – some well-executed nipple stimulation can be mind-blowing.
Tracey Cox shared six sexual weapons for transforming bedroom bores into adventurous lovers (file image)
Levels of sensitivity vary wildly so always start gentle then increase. Begin with mild stroking, then move into a gentle pulling of the nipples. If that’s going down well, try nibbling or even nipping the nipples.
Ardent fans of nipple play will love clamps: clips you attach to the nipple and leave while continuing other stimulation elsewhere. Be warned though: even the gentlest still packs a powerful punch.
If you like the idea of it but find clamps a bit much, check out the many suction toys that use air pressure. They’re designed for clitoral use but work well on the nipples as well.
It’s totally possible for both men and women to orgasm exclusively through nipple stimulation, by the way.
The 69er secret
It’s something couples enthusiastically suggest at the start of a relationship but lose interest in later.
Why? The very concept sets it up for failure. Both of you are giving each other pleasure simultaneously, meaning it’s incredibly easy to get carried away and forget about your partner.
Tracey (pictured) said agree to take turns to avoid forgetting about your partner during 69
Sort it by having a plan: agree to take turns with the person closest to orgasm getting preference. Switch to using your fingers if your tongue’s getting tired or you need a break: it’s not ‘cheating’, it’s sensible!
Try lying on your sides and using each other’s thighs as a pillow to rest your head on; or add pillows to make things comfortable or parts more accessible.
Your ultimate secret sex weapon in a 69er? Insert a butt plug. It’s already a massive turn on to both give and receive pleasure at the same time.
Adding anal stimulation to the mix turns it from feeling intense to utterly extraordinary.
The four intercourse changers
It might feel nice but fewer than one in five women reach orgasm through intercourse alone.
Happily, a landmark study of more than 3,000 American women has changed all that. The women were asked to reveal how they increased pleasure during penetrative sex and unearthed four highly effective techniques that increase the likelihood of orgasm.
Add one of these to your standard intercourse session and turn that orgasm-for-one into an orgasm for all.
Seventy-six percent of the women used ‘rocking’: rocking their body up and down so the clitoris constantly rubbed against the base of the penis. Even more (88 per cent) ‘angled’: rotated, raised or lowered their pelvis or hips during penetration.
‘Shallowing’ was used by 83 per cent of women to orgasm: they enjoyed being stimulated just inside the vagina with the tip of a penis or finger, sex toy or tongue.
The least common technique (70 per cent) – pairing – is probably the best known. Pairing involves using fingers or a sex toy to stimulate the clitoris during intercourse.
Tracey suggests playing audio porn while a woman is being stimulated with hands, tongue, penis or a sex toy (file image)
A new slant on the original
The Kivin method is a remarkably simple but revolutionary method that offers a different slant – literally – to traditional oral sex methods.
Instead of lying between her legs, lie perpendicular to her body, face down, with her leg resting over the back of your neck. It’s a subtle shift that provides you with a lot more access to stimulate the whole of the vulva.
THE BEST OF THE REST
And for your final signature sex move….
Wear your own natural scent as perfume. Yes, I do mean putting your fingers inside yourself then dabbing behind your ears and on your wrists.
Tease toys turn every day into orgasm day. Get her to wear vibrating panties and hand the controls over to you – then head out for the weekly supermarket shop. Or insert a love egg, go out for dinner and hand him the remote control just before the waiter appears to take your order.
Unexpectedly switch roles. He’s on top? Flip it so you’re riding him. If you’re always dominant in bed, lie back and say you’re not moving a muscle: they’re the boss this time. You’re the one lying back and taking? Shake things up by tying their hands behind their back and taking control.
Try the ‘blow-up doll’ hand-job technique: Weave your hands together and interlock your thumbs leaving a space in the middle, rather like a ‘fake vagina’ sex toy. With his penis snuggled nicely inside, move your hand up and down keeping a firm grip. Add a twist for extra effect.
Attempt a golden shower – in the shower. Peeing on each other for sexual kicks isn’t anything new – but it is popular. Around four per cent of men list this as their fetish and Pornhub searches for ‘golden shower’ rose by a massive 289% when the Trump scandal broke. Doing it in the shower makes it far less scary and is the ideal place to try it with a squeamish partner.
Another oral sex method that will get you noticed: get her to sit in a chair.
It can be straight backed with no sides: in which case, she simply sits with legs open and feet on the floor. Or get her to drape her legs over the sides of an armchair.
Transform a BJ for him by holding your bullet or classic vibrator to the side of your cheek as you fellate him. If you really want to make his day, reach behind with the other hand to hold his testicles in your palm. Inserting a well-lubed thumb or finger anally is another orgasm supersizer for either of you (but always get permission first).
Another way to turn ordinary oral into something quite unexpected…
Add aural to oral
There’s a reason why audio porn is one of the fastest growing categories of porn in 2022.
Make it your secret sex weapon by handing over some earphones, plugged into a device which has preselected audio porn ready to roll. As she listens, continue to stimulate her with your hands, tongue, penis or a sex toy.
Lots of women don’t enjoy watching porn with their partner for fear they’re being unfavourably compared with the person onscreen – or just find it embarrassing.
Audio porn is something entirely different – especially if she’s the only one who can hear what’s going on. Women respond well to erotic tales because we like a story behind the seduction. She gets to indulge in an aural guided fantasy, while you take her to orgasm with some skilled tongue techniques.
Hump, grind and scissor your way to an orgasm
Rubbing your genitals rhythmically and consistently against something is how lots of us had our very first orgasm.
You can move against your partner’s thigh, hip, leg or arm or against the leg of an armchair or firm pillow.
If you’re a same sex couple, you might want to try ‘tribbing’: rubbing your vulvas together.
Straight couples can try ‘scissoring’: lie with your heads at opposite ends of the bed and legs spread, then shimmy together until your bits touch, making the shape of a pair of scissors.
From there, wiggle, grind and gyrate your hips in a circular motion to discover what feels pleasurable for both.
Tracey’s weekly podcast, SexTok comes out every Tuesday. Listen wherever you listen to your podcasts. Find her blog, products and latest book at traceycox.com.
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