Demi Lovato says DMX's overdose could have been her, talks survivor's guilt

Demi Lovato is aware of the disturbing parallels between her 2018 overdose and what DMX is currently experiencing as he fights for his life in the hospital. 

DMX, the 50-year-old rapper whose real name is Earl Simmons, is currently in critical condition in the ICU after suffering a heart attack on Friday. The heart attack was reportedly triggered by a possible drug overdose. 

Speaking withTMZ Live on Tuesday, Lovato opened up about hearing the news of the performer's critical condition. 

"Anytime that I see somebody OD or even pass away that's in the public eye, I immediately think, 'That could have been you had you not been putting all this work in to the last couple years of your life,'" the 28-year-old "The Art of Starting Over" singer shared. "There's times where I've even talked about feeling survivor's guilt because you do ask yourself why am I still here? Why are others not? It's a challenging thing to get over." 

Lovato, who revealed in her YouTube docuseries, Demi Lovato: Dancing With the Devil, that doctors had given her five to 10 more minutes to survive after her 2018 overdose, said that she tries to see the positive in her situation. 

"Ultimately, I had to realize that every day is a day that someone else doesn't get," she continued. "Every day that I'm here on this earth is a day that I need to be counting my blessings for and just being appreciative and grateful for it. It makes me want to live the best life I can possibly live, knowing that others didn't get the same chance that I did." 

In her docuseries, Lovato opens up about the many medical complications and struggles she faced following the overdose. 

"I had three strokes. I had a heart attack. I suffered brain damage from the strokes," Lovato shared. "I can't drive anymore. I have blind spots in my vision." 

Vigils have been held outside of DMX's hospital room in White Plains, New York, following the news of his condition. 

A source close to DMX told ET that medical staff "tried to revive him twice in the house, and revived him again in the hospital."

"This is a very difficult time for the family," another source told ET, adding that DMX had recently relapsed with his drug addiction and had also suffered from COVID-19. "They are standing by his bedside, holding his hand and praying. They are really in prayer mode."

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