Late Night Riffs on Republicans’ Flip-Flop Over Supreme Court Seat

Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. We’re all stuck at home at the moment, so here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.

Shameless Seat Fillers

On Monday, the late-night hosts bemoaned the speed with which Republicans are moving to fill the late Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg’s Supreme Court seat. Prominent G.O.P. senators, including Mitch McConnell, Lindsey Graham and Ted Cruz, said they would support a pre-election vote on whoever President Trump nominates — despite having opposed such a move in 2016, when Barack Obama was president. Trump led a crowd in chanting, “Fill that seat!”

“As you know, Supreme Court justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg passed away on Friday, and the host of ‘Celebrity Apprentice’ would like to be the one to replace her.” — JIMMY KIMMEL

“Sure, the Olympics were canceled, but at least we have the Republicans to show off some truly spectacular back flips.” — JIMMY FALLON

“Well, there you have it, folks. When you have the Senate, you can do whatever you want. Trump is right — it’s basically the ‘When you’re a star, they let you do it,’ but of judicial appointments.’” — TREVOR NOAH

“Now, I don’t think anybody’s surprised that Senate Republicans said one thing when Obama was president and another thing when it’s Trump. I mean, you can’t even call them inconsistent, you know? Doing whatever it takes to get his way is the one consistent principle that Mitch McConnell lives by. You know, it’s that and eating baby birds right out of the nest.” — TREVOR NOAH

“Trump really wants this Supreme Court fight, but there’s a danger in Trump basing his re-election on this, because 62 percent of Americans want the seat to remain vacant compared to only 23 percent who want him to fill it. [imitating Trump] ‘People love the way I shanked Covid. Quick, find something to take their mind off it. I’ve narrowed it down to hastily replacing the most beloved Supreme Court justice or drop-kicking Baby Yoda.’” — STEPHEN COLBERT

“Speaking of lifetime appointments, I can’t believe Donald J. Trump — Donald J. Trump, people — gets to name three justices to the Supreme Court. The guy can’t even name three branches of government, but he gets to name three justices who serve for life. This is the same guy who’s had to fire everyone he hired because of how bad he is at hiring people.” — TREVOR NOAH

“Yeah, the Trump campaign is now selling ‘Fill that seat’ T-shirts. Seriously, someone just passed away and he’s selling T-shirts like they just clinched the American League East.” — JIMMY FALLON

“Here’s some advice: if you are wondering how to deal with a job opening when someone dies and you find yourself on a custom T-shirt website, you’ve made a wrong turn. Even long-haul drivers with truck nuts were like, ‘That’s just crude and unnecessary.’”— JIMMY FALLON

“Now, look, I get that highlighting their hypocrisy is mostly pointless. Hypocrisy only matters if you have shame. They don’t. Mitch McConnell certainly isn’t capable of feeling shame. He looks like a haunted, wooden doll you’d find in an estate sale and has the same level of emotional complexity.” — SETH MEYERS

“I get that the hypocrisy is baked in. Pointing it out won’t change their minds. It’s like telling a middle school bully, ‘Giving me a wedgie won’t make your parents get back together.’ He knows that — he just wants to give you that wedgie.” — SETH MEYERS

The Punchiest Punchlines (Gender Reveal Edition)

“Trump is thrilled to have this opportunity. A source close to him revealed that Trump has been ‘salivating’ to nominate a replacement — so get ready for Supreme Court Justice Extra Crispy.” — STEPHEN COLBERT

“But he’s promised a female nominee. This means Trump is going to be spending a lot of time this weekend enjoying his favorite hobby: rating women on a scale of one to 10.” — JAMES CORDEN

“Is it just me or does it sound like Trump’s announcing a sacrifice? ‘It will be a woman!’” — JAMES CORDEN

“Trump said that like he was announcing the gender of the next royal baby: ‘Hear ye, hear ye! It will be a woman.’” — JIMMY FALLON

“Now we’re doing Supreme Court justice gender reveals.” — JIMMY KIMMEL

The Bits Worth Watching

Julianne Moore talked with Jimmy Fallon about playing the feminist icon Gloria Steinem in her new film, “The Glorias.”

What We’re Excited About on Tuesday Night

The Emmy-winning stars of “Schitt’s Creek” will appear on Tuesday’s “Jimmy Kimmel Live.”

Also, Check This Out

The 24-year-old “Euphoria” star Zendaya made history during Sunday night’s Emmy Awards, becoming the youngest person ever to win Best Lead Actress in a Drama.

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